Well, I don’t run the server, but the Rarepair Starira server is absolutely still going strong. If you want an invite link, you can direct message me and I’ll ask for one from the mods.
[ID: a doodle of two people looking away from each other. The first person is thinking, “If they wanted me to know they would tell me. I shouldn’t ask about it.” The second person is thinking, “If they cared about it they would ask me. I shouldn’t talk About it.” End ID.]
First image: Tweet by @/mistressmatisse Mistress Matisse reading, “If you’re a sex worker, think VERY carefully about joining Threads, because here’s what Mark Zuckerberg did to me: I had a FB account as Mistress Matisse, but FB scraped my legal name from somewhere else and then changed my displayed NAME on my account without notice/consent. Yep.”
Second image: #this happened to a lot of trans people too #and people hiding from stalkers and escaping abusive situations #there’s no room in the metaverse for personal safety
you ever accidentally create a recurring theme in your writing. you start putting together an outline for something you’ve never written before and get partway through planning, rearrange the pieces, and go “GODDAMMIT THIS IS ABOUT GRIEF AGAIN”? because let me tell you,
Between being a writer and playing a lot of ttrpgs, I spew out the same goddam themes constantly and it drives me insane BE A DIFFERENT PERSON, SUBCONSCIOUS please YOU ARE REVEALING OUR INNER TRUTH THROUGH ART, ASSHOLE
This site has been going around Twitter trans accounts quite a bit lately, so just pointing out here too that it’ll do fuck all, they’re exploiting trans people at a time when hrt is particularly hard to access and please don’t give them your money
fuckin exploitative bullshit marketed in the worst way imaginable
literally selling laxatives as weight loss supplements
No actually, this needs to be in the body of the post.
This isn’t someone looking to make a quick buck off the backs of desperate trans women.
This is someone who is gathering a hit list. This person may use your info for active swatting, but not just that, this product will kill you.
This product is outright dangerous. This dose of ashwagandha is ASTRONOMICAL. It’s anxiolytic - meaning that it causes agitation and anxiety - and if you take this dose every day you’ll be developing serotonin syndrome within 4-6 weeks, and an ER trip/death within 8. And if you’re on medications that interact (SSRIs, antipsychotics, most kinds of opiates) or alcohol, this risk is magnified.
This person wants to KILL YOU.
Also the photo they’re using for the founder is AI generated. The easiest tell is the neck tattoo seemingly merging with the collar of the shirt, and none of the locs actually having an end that connects them to the scalp.
There’s a terf in the comments screeding about how this totally isn’t a rightwing psyop and it’s asian fetishizing trans ppl obsessed with anime doing this, so here’s some irrefutable proof that it is, in fact, a right-wing dox honeypot!
If you go to any post by TheQueerQuirk on Twitter and replace the username part of the url with transaretr8ors it will redirect you to the same tweet with the new username, indicating that TheQueerQuirk’s old username WAS in fact transaretr8ors. You can test this yourself.
They’re also stealing images from r/transtimelines for fake reviews.
Their domain name was registered on June 2 and the address marked is a common scam address (seemingly of the Icelandic Phallological Museum).
THIS IS A HONEYPOT. THEY’RE COLLECTING ADDRESSES. YOU COULD BE SWATTED, HAVE YOUR IDENTITY STOLEN, OR AT THE VERY BEST RECEIVE A PRODUCT THAT WILL CAUSE SEROTONIN SYNDROME.
So what I’ve learned from the past couple months of being really loud about being a bi woman on Tumblr is: A lot of young/new LGBT+ people on this site do not understand that some of the stuff they’re saying comes across to other LGBT+ people as offensive, aggressive, or threatening. And when they actually find out the history and context, a lot of them go, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I never meant to say that.”
Like, “queer is a slur”: I get the impression that people saying this are like… oh, how I might react if I heard someone refer to all gay men as “f*gs”. Like, “Oh wow, that’s a super loaded word with a bunch of negative freight behind it, are you really sure you want to put that word on people who are still very raw and would be alarmed, upset, or offended if they heard you call them it, no matter what you intended?”
So they’re really surprised when self-described queers respond with a LOT of hostility to what feels like a well-intentioned reminder that some people might not like it.
That’s because there’s a history of “political lesbians”, like Sheila Jeffreys, who believe that no matter their sexual orientation, women should cut off all social contact with men, who are fundamentally evil, and only date the “correct” sex, which is other women. Political lesbians claim that relationships between women, especially ones that don’t contain lust, are fundamentally pure, good, and unproblematic. They therefore regard most of the LGBT community with deep suspicion, because its members are either way too into sex, into the wrong kind of sex, into sex with men, are men themselves, or somehow challenge the very definitions of sex and gender.
When “queer theory” arrived in the 1980s and 1990s as an organized attempt by many diverse LGBT+ people in academia to sit down and talk about the social oppressions they face, political lesbians like Jeffreys attacked it harshly, publishing articles like “The Queer Disappearance of Lesbians”, arguing that because queer theory said it was okay to be a man or stop being a man or want to have sex with a man, it was fundamentally evil and destructive. And this attitude has echoed through the years; many LGBT+ people have experience being harshly criticized by radical feminists because being anything but a cis “gold star lesbian” (another phrase that gives me war flashbacks) was considered patriarchal, oppressive, and basically evil.
And when those arguments happened, “queer” was a good umbrella to shelter under, even when people didn’t know the intricacies of academic queer theory; people who identified as “queer” were more likely to be accepting and understanding, and “queer” was often the only label or community bisexual and nonbinary people didn’t get chased out of. If someone didn’t disagree that people got to call themselves queer, but didn’t want to be called queer themselves, they could just say “I don’t like being called queer” and that was that. Being “queer” was to being LGBT as being a “feminist” was to being a woman; it was opt-in.
But this history isn’t evident when these interactions happen. We don’t sit down and say, “Okay, so forty years ago there was this woman named Sheila, and…” Instead we queers go POP! like pufferfish, instantly on the defensive, a red haze descending over our vision, and bellow, “DO NOT TELL ME WHAT WORDS I CANNOT USE,” because we cannot find a way to say, “This word is so vital and precious to me, I wouldn’t be alive in the same way if I lost it.” And then the people who just pointed out that this word has a history, JEEZ, way to overreact, go away very confused and off-put, because they were just trying to say.
But I’ve found that once this is explained, a lot of people go, “Oh wow, okay, I did NOT mean to insinuate that, I didn’t realize that I was also saying something with a lot of painful freight to it.”
And that? That gives me hope for the future.
Similarily: “Dyke/butch/femme are lesbian words, bisexual/pansexual women shouldn’t use them.”
When I speak to them, lesbians who say this seem to be under the impression that bisexuals must have our own history and culture and words that are all perfectly nice, so why can’t we just use those without poaching someone else’s?
And often, they’re really shocked when I tell them: We don’t. We can’t. I’d love to; it’s not possible.
“Lesbian” used to be a word that simply meant a woman who loved other women. And until feminism, very, very few women had the economic freedom to choose to live entirely away from men. Lesbian bars that began in the 1930s didn’t interrogate you about your history at the door; many of the women who went there seeking romantic or sexual relationships with other women were married to men at the time. When The Daughters of Bilitis formed in 1955 to work for the civil and political wellbeing of lesbians, the majority of its members were closeted, married women, and for those women, leaving their husbands and committing to lesbian partners was a risky and arduous process the organization helped them with. Women were admitted whether or not they’d at one point truly loved or desired their husbands or other men–the important thing was that they loved women and wanted to explore that desire.
Lesbian groups turned against bisexual and pansexual women as a class in the 1970s and 80s, when radical feminists began to teach that to escape the Patriarchy’s evil influence, women needed to cut themselves off from men entirely. Having relationships with men was “sleeping with the enemy” and colluding with oppression. Many lesbian radical feminists viewed, and still view, bisexuality as a fundamentally disordered condition that makes bisexuals unstable, abusive, anti-feminist, and untrustworthy.
That process of expelling bi women from lesbian groups with immense prejudice continues to this day and leaves scars on a lot of bi/pan people. A lot of bisexuals, myself included, have an experience of “double discrimination”; we are made to feel unwelcome or invisible both in straight society, and in LGBT spaces. And part of this is because attempts to build a bisexual/pansexual community identity have met with strong resistance from gays and lesbians, so we have far fewer books, resources, histories, icons, organizations, events, and resources than gays and lesbians do, despite numerically outnumbering them..
So every time I hear that phrase, it’s another painful reminder for me of all the experiences I’ve had being rejected by the lesbian community. But bisexual experiences don’t get talked about or signalboosted much,so a lot of young/new lesbians literally haven’t learned this aspect of LGBT+ history.
And once I’ve explained it, I’ve had a heartening number of lesbians go, “That’s not what I wanted to happen, so I’m going to stop saying that.”
This is good information for people who carry on with the “queer is a slur” rhetoric and don’t comprehend the push back.
ive been saying for years that around 10 years ago on tumblr, it was only radfems who were pushing the queer as slur rhetoric, and everyone who was trans or bi or allies to them would push back - radfems openly admitted that the reason they disliked the term “queer” was because it lumped them in with trans people and bi women. over the years, the queer is a slur rhetoric spread in large part due to that influence, but radfems were more covert about their reasons - and now it’s a much more prevalent belief on tumblr - more so than on any queer space i’ve been in online or offline - memory online is very short-term unfortunately bc now i see a lot of ppl, some of them bi or trans themselves, who make this argument and vehemently deny this history but…yep
Or asexuality, which has been a concept in discussions on sexuality since 1869. Initially grouped slightly to the left, as in the categories were ‘heterosexual’, ‘homosexual’, and ‘monosexual’ (which is used differently now, but then described what we would call asexuality). Later was quite happily folded in as a category of queerness by
Magnus Hirschfeld
and Emma Trosse in the 1890s, as an orientation that was not heterosexuality and thus part of the community.
Another good source here, also talking about aromanticism as well. Aspec people have been included in queer studies as long as queer studies have existed.
Also, just in my own experiences, the backlash against ‘queer’ is still really recent. When I was first working out my orientation at thirteen in 2000, there was absolutely zero issue with the term. I hung out on queer sites, looked for queer media, and was intrigued by queer studies. There were literally sections of bookstores in Glebe and Newtown labelled ‘Queer’. It was just… there, and so were we!
So it blows my mind when there are these fifteen-year-olds earnestly telling me - someone who’s called themself queer longer than they’ve been alive - that “que*r is a slur.” Unfortunately, I have got reactive/defensive for the same reasons OP has mentioned. I will absolutely work on biting down my initial defensiveness and trying to explain - in good faith - the history of the word, and how it’s been misappropriated and tarnished by exclusionists.
Worth noting here is a sneaky new front I’ve seen radfems start using:
Yeah, okay, maybe older LGBTs use queer and fag and dyke…but they’re cringey, and you don’t want to be cringe, do you?
I’m not even joking. They strip the loud-and-proud aspects of our history out of all context, remove every bit of blood, sweat, and tears the queer community poured into things like anti-discrimination laws and AIDS research funding, and use those screams of rebellion to say we’re weird, and you wouldn’t want to be WEIRD.
Stop and think about that for a minute.
Yeah. They are not the arbiters of our community and they never were, and it’s important to not give them the time of day.
Tbh I think fandom generally needs to get better at sitting with the uncomfortable fact that a story/fanwork/meme/whatever can hurt one person and help another
This is why I think “tag warning” culture is kinder and more constructive than cancel culture / “no problematic content” culture. One size does not fit all, but if we learn to be more aware of the fact that the same thing can be emotionally validating or cathartic to one person and upsetting to another, and pick up a general mindset of thinking before we post, “what might people need a heads up for in this content?”, we grow more compassionate, more thoughtful, and more understanding of the differences in people’s experiences.
There is no statement you can make that applies to every religion in the world. Full stop.
“But all religions follow a book or other form of guidelines!” Nope!
“But all religions discourage independent thinking and questioning!” Wrong again!!
“But all religions believe in some sort of higher power or supreme being!” Stop talking!!!
Any attempts at forcing all religions under one blanket statement are ignorant at best, violently bigoted at worst. Even the term religion itself has a dubious definition and a political weight behind what practices and traditions are called “religion” and what are “spirituality” or “mythology.”
Christianity is not the be-all-end-all of religion. Neither is whatever your personal religious background is. Stop trying to force your preconceived beliefs and biases onto religion as a whole.
The admin at the WIXOSS wiki, also known as Haruna. Questions can be funneled to the "ask me whatever" link above, the wikia, or the Card Games Discord chatroom. I can answer questions about the TCG or the anime.
I am involved in a great many fandoms, but am most heavily involved in Revue Starlight.
